There is an endless stream of visitors to our room. I am the the perpetual hostess. Polite and inviting. Regurgitating the events of the past 24 hours to no less than a dozen doctors, usually before breakfast.
(Me) “Yes, he has had 87 poopie diapers. No, I’m not sure what it means, either.”
(Me) “Yes, his heartrate is 225 beats per minute. You’re right, it does seem a tad fast.”
We ordered more blood work. (Me)”Of course you did, he doesn’t need all that pesky blood, anyway.”
Do the eyedrops bother him? (Me)”No, every hour on the hour is quite comforting.”
Do you understand what the Basiliximab does? (Me)”Of course, I do. It is a chimeric mouse-human monoclonal antibody to the α chain (CD25) of the IL-2 receptor of T cells.”
hmmm, Really? I thought it killed T-cells. (Me)”Isn’t that what I said?”
We will need a stool sample. (Me)”He’s got 87 of them, take your pick.”
Our public isolation really isn’t that isolated. Several people visit us, some daily, others only once or twice a week. Maybe it just seems like they all picked the same day to stop by.
The Child Life specialist: Thanks for stopping by, but no, really I don’t need a magazine to read.
The Chaplain: Thanks for stopping by, you’re right God does have a weird sense of humor, doesn’t he?
The Child Life volunteer: Thanks for stopping by, again, but no, I really don’t need a magazine to read.
The CVC nurse: Really, ALL the dressings need to be changed?
The housekeeping staff: Yes, that is a lot of poopie diapers. I’m sorry.
The pharmacy delivery: Thank you for dropping off the 47 bags of meds, you’re right, he must really be sick.
The dirty linen collector: Well, 87 poopie diapers, a couple are bound to leak. I’m sorry.
The Child Life volunteer: Thanks for stopping by, again, but no, I’m sure I don’t need a magazine to read.
The Physial Therapist: Thanks for stopping by, yes, it has been a long day when you sleep through your physical therapy.
The Social Worker: Thanks for stopping by, you’re right, I do have quite a bit of time on my hands, maybe I should read a magazine.
The X-ray Tech: Thanks for stopping by, yes, he has had quite a few x-rays, soon he’ll glow in the dark and we won’t need your services anymore.
The Gentle Reader: Thanks for stopping by, please, watch your step, those 87 poopie diapers are really starting to pile up.