Grief’s Playlist

My iPod is my constant companion, so much so, I don’t hear the phone ring, (not that I want to) I don’t hear certain people sneak up on me while I’m doing the dishes and I don’t hear the silence of the night while I feign sleep.

Music was my escape while incarcerated with Capt Snuggles. I placed my iPod in the docking station and played a wide variety of musical stylings. On good days I would play playlists I had created that were upbeat, feel-good songs, country, pop, classic rock, all well known songs.

On not so good days, I played what I call David’s Lullabies, a 30-track piano-only rendition of children’s lullabies and songs by Michael Silverman. The counter on my iPod says I played it 1200 times.

There were a lot of not so good days.

Everyone that walked into our room commented on our music – either they walked out with a smile and a spring in their step or they relaxed into the peaceful environment I worked so hard to achieve. Either way I have good memories of the folks who visited and the songs they enjoyed or shared their own memories of.

Because, let’s face it – music is always there – there are songs for the good times in life as well as the bad. Songs that get us through and songs that help us heal.

I need the later, songs to get me through and songs to help me heal.

One of our Chaperones offered I Believe by Diamond Rio. (Thanks M) It has been added to my current playlist that includes:

Things Left Unsaid by Desciple                                                                                                   Why by Rascal Flatts                                                                                                                     Colder Weather by Zac Brown Band                                                                                     Broken by Evanescence                                                                                                                Sweet Child of Mine by Guns and Roses  (I listened to this a lot after Nathaniel)  Angel of Montgomery by Bonnie Raitt                                                                           Landslide by Fleetwood Mac

Now there’s more songs on my current playlist  than that, but I’m curious – what would you add? What song or songs have gotten you through a difficult time?

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Categories: Life | Tags: , , , , , , | 32 Comments

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32 thoughts on “Grief’s Playlist

  1. It’s amazing how music can help us get through some heavy times.
    Please link to my February Music Hop when you can – perfect timing 🙂 http://bit.ly/glk966

  2. I had a really hard time after my Dad died, and the song that got me through was “No-One But You” by Queen. I cried every time I listened to it, but I think I needed to cry. A couple of years later, when I got hit with George’s autism diagnosis, the song was “Come With Me” by Phil Collins. That is still the song I listen to the most on my BlackBerry when I’m training for my annual autism runs and things get tough.
    Music is wonderful. It is therapeutic, and it can be an expression of how we feel when we’re not able to put it into words.
    Kirsten

  3. Mandy Schotter

    I Dreamed a Dream – Glee Cast
    Up to the Mountain – Kelly Clarkson
    Broken – Lindsey Haun
    Keep Holding On – Glee Cast
    I’ll Stand by You – Glee Cast
    Hold On – Michael Buble

  4. Please Don’t Go by Barcelona
    I can’t imagine life without it.
    Glad your still going. One day at a time.

  5. Tears in Heaven Eric Clapton
    End of the road Boys to Men
    Candle in the wind Elton John

  6. Elaine

    My friend works at Cincinnati Children’s and shared your blog with me. My heart breaks for you! My prayers are with you!

    This Woman’s Work by Kate Bush

  7. When my mother in law passed, the song that helped my husband and siblings-in-law was One Sweet Day by Mariah Carey and Boys 2 Men

  8. libby

    I started a blog a while ago but stopped writing after two posts. I love the music on the page though. These are some of the songs on it.
    http://eliasandy.blogspot.com/
    sleep -azure ray
    answer-sarah mclachlan
    nella fantasia-celtic woman
    colors-amos lee
    keep breathing-ingrid michaelson
    breathe me-sia

  9. Music really does bring back memories and help transform a mood. I hope you’re finding some comfort in music right now.

  10. This is not at all how / We thought it was supposed to be
    We had so many plans for you / We had so many dreams
    And now you’ve gone away / And left us with the memories of your smile
    And nothing we can say / And nothing we can do
    Can take away the pain / The pain of losing you, but …

    We can cry with hope / We can say goodbye with hope
    ‘Cause we know our goodbye is not the end, oh no
    And we can grieve with hope / ‘Cause we believe with hope
    (There’s a place by God’s grace)
    There’s a place where we’ll see your face again
    We’ll see your face again

    And never have I known / Anything so hard to understand
    And never have I questioned more / The wisdom of God’s plan
    But through the cloud of tears / I see the Father’s smile and say well done
    And I imagine you / Where you wanted most to be
    Seeing all your dreams come true / ‘Cause now you’re home
    And now you’re free, and …

    We have this hope as an anchor / ‘Cause we believe that everything
    God promised us is true, so …
    So we can cry with hope / And say goodbye with hope
    We wait with hope / And we ache with hope
    We hold on with hope / We let go with hope

  11. I haven’t known what to say until this point. I’ve not lost a child, but been with you through your heartbreak with David. I am so sorry. I’m a year and a half through the grief of losing my father. This is my soundtrack:
    Never say Never – The Fray (The first song I heard after I left the hospital – “Don’t let me go” haunted me; still does)
    Kind and Generous – Natalie Merchant
    More – Tyrone Wells
    The Other Side – David Gray
    Go On – Jack Johnson
    Shattered – O.A.R.
    Just Breathe – Pearl Jam
    Heaven – Brett Dennen
    Finally Home – Mercy Me (I imagine your little boys will sing this to their father someday…)
    Untitled Hymm – Chris Rice
    One More Day – Diamond Rio

    I hope you find comfort and peace with your music.

  12. Stephanie

    My little brother died last June. I too turned to music certain songs made me feel better.
    Praise You in This Storm- Casting Crowns
    You Raise Me Up- Selah
    My thoughts and heart are still with you.
    Steph

  13. Joy

    Bell, Book & Candle – Eddi Reader
    Europa (Earth’s Cry Heaven’s Smile) – Santana
    Hallelujah – k.d. lang
    Crying – Roy Orbison & k.d. lang
    Angel – Sarah McLachlan

    and anything by Lhasa de Sela

    May peace be a companion to you… My thoughts are with you…

  14. You can Ping me or follow me on itunes and I can follow you and your friends. Music is a great escape and reminds some of us the better times. I am glad you have found solice in this time of grief. Look for me under my name or jagmom3d@aol.com I forget how ping works.

    Wishing many blessings,
    Diane

  15. Beth Nielsen Chapman-“Sand and Water” album
    Over the Rhine- “Good Dog, Bad Dog” and”Drunkard’s Prayer” albums
    I never know what to say, but I’m abiding with you.

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  17. scottsgal

    Who You’d Be Today by Kenny Chesney is pretty powerful

  18. Kerry

    Rise Above by Seether is one of them – music has helped me a lot through the various steps in my life. When I lost my father, when my marriage fell apart, my first miscarriage, my second and third – thinking I would never have a child (Sweet Child of Mine made me sob) – and so many others have seen me through an unexpected pregnancy, the loss of my partner, etc. etc. etc.
    Right now the theme songs to my life involve Real Gone from the movie Cars and the themes from Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and Caillou! 🙂

    Keep on holding strong.

  19. shaula

    It has been 12 years since I lost my boyfriend, but these songs still move me:
    Kind and Generous – Natalie Merchant
    Heaven’s Here on Earth – Tracy Chapman

    I also love Breathe Me by Sia. Wishing you comfort and peace.

  20. I listen to the Winter Song by Sarah Barielles over and over in the winter. It brings me comfort and also gives me permission to crack when I need to. Thinking of you as always.

  21. “Golden” by Jill Scott helped me during a time when my self esteem was in the toilet. I find the lyrics to be empowering.

  22. Carol

    “Forever” by the Eurythmics.
    Usually very loud, in my car, on repeat.

  23. So true! Music is powerful. Those are some great songs. I know music has helped me through many moments in my life.

    Sarah McLachlan’s Angel has given me comfort in the past.

    Much Love,
    Amy

  24. Kim

    Transcended by Paul McDermott. It really captures the feeling I had that the world kept turning when I felt like it should grind to a stop in acknowledgment of what had happened.

  25. Kim

    Actually, this video is better:

  26. sharon

    Music is a wonderful consolation. Weirdly the music that got me through my younger sister’s death was Verdi’s Requiem. I am not religious but, to my ear and heart, that is a glorious piece of music that roars raw emotion.

    xoxox

  27. Patty

    Check out a new album by Steven Curtis Chapman called Beauty Will Rise. I think most of the songs can be heard on youtube.

  28. Faith Hill’s “There will come a day” really touches me.

  29. I don’t know why I don’t use music more when I love it so much. I think it’s because I’m not very skilled at downloading or knowing what to pick. So I have nothing to offer, but it looks like there are some good selections here.

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  31. I listen to Landslide a LOT! It’s such a comforting song.

  32. I was separated from my (now) husband when I learned I was pregnant. When I found out, there wasn’t any question about my joy of having a child, but how I was going to raise him by myself along with his older brother. It was such a desolate moment because I had never felt so scared and alone. At the time, I didn’t think we would ever be able to resolve things. As I was leaving the clinic hospital in tears, the song “Jesus Take The Wheel” came on. I honestly don’t know who sings it, and I’m not a huge fan of country music, but that song sent a sense of peace straight through me. I felt like it was a sign. And now here I am, happily married. The baby saved our relationship.

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